Dog and bone
September 30th 2009 22:41
Another day, another bone. This was one which didn't get stuck.
In a moment of high drama yesterday, my childhood dreams of becoming a vet and a saver of animals came close to being realised.
Scratchy's first aim when given food is to put it inside him. Swallow first is his credo. If chewing proves necessary, we'll worry about that later. It is a rule which can get him into trouble when eating bones, bricks and some of the larger items of garden furniture.
Late yesterday I was preparing a dinner of pork spare ribs and the dogs were treated to a trimmed bone each. Daisy took hers daintily and danced off to a corner to smother it in licks and kisses. Scratchy grabbed his, realised it was at the wrong angle for a quick swallow, turned it, and got it stuck in his teeth.
The bone was rectangular, and lodged across the roof of his mouth, wedged neatly between his big back teeth.
I realised something was wrong when he began opening and closing his mouth. I moved towards him but he ran to the back shed area. When I reached him, he was stretching his mouth wide open and closing it, rapidly and agitatedly.
Something had to be done, but what? He was moving around and shaking his head, and his jaw was working furiously. Putting my hand in his mouth would probably just add a finger or two to an already overcrowded space.
Now Scratchy lowered his head and used a forepaw, trying to scratch at the bone. That was never going to work, but it was an indication that he was getting desperate and I had to act.
I thought I'd have to use one hand to hold his mouth while I used the other to try to dislodge the bone. I tried to grab the top and front of his mouth, around the nose area, but he was still moving his head and I missed, grabbing instead the bottom half of his jaw. Now, instead of having my fingers looped securely either side of his big canine teeth, I expected those canines to puncture the back of my hand any second.
There was no time to start again, however, and my free hand went in search of the stuck bone.
Almost immediately, I managed to hook my finger under the edge. Great! I pulled, and pulled, and pulled. The bone didn't move. Scratchy, who weighs just under 38 kilograms, squirmed furiously. Deep breath and big, sharp, sudden pull. The bone came loose.
I withdrew my slobber-covered hands and looked at Scratchy. Crunch, crunch, I heard. Swallow.
Then he looked at me, a meeting of eyes, hearts and minds. Was this my beautiful big boy's way of showing his appreciation for a job well done? No. I know that look. It was his way of asking if there were any more bones.
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Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
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Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
It just reminded me of Melville, Herman.
It is, the one and only, Champion, Chris.
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Comment by Roux
Mr. Champion, I'm hoping and am sure you did not lose any fingers, or hands in the process. It sounds like Scratchy managed to restrain himslef from chomping you still had these delicate parts within his mouth. For this I'm grateful, and somewhat amazed.
Roux
Comment by Chris Champion
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Scratchy did indeed manage to restrain himself, and I still have all 11 fingers ... no, wait, one, two ... anyway, when I call Scratchy bonehead in future it will have special meaning
Comment by Tracy
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Rarely has so much been expressed with so little
Comment by IandMe
Thank you for your dedication to your art. Scratchy didn't seem to mind at all, I think he even posed for that photo.
Janice
Comment by Chris Champion
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You're right, I'm brilliant. The trick is to take the photograph earlier. In this case, I took the picture about two years earlier
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