Scratchy's diary: The installation artist
April 2nd 2010 23:00
Daisy once said I couldn't do something creative if I was injected with the DNA of Vincent van Dogh. Which was hurtful.
So I decided to prove her wrong.
It took a dog's instincts to create this work of art. You have to get behind the curtain to start, then do your regular five or six turns before lying down.
The result, I think, is a great piece of installation art (especially as I am actually in it), and I hope it proves an inspiration to all bitch-pecked dogs out there.
You know who you are, and it is in your honour that I have called this work Inspiralling.
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Comment by Anonymous
Heidi says yer as silly as a two bob watch, an a real wombat besides, she ses dus yu plan ter stay there through dinner time? An, how does ther dingbat plan ter get out uv that mess? Act'ally she said much bigger words 'n thut but yer gets me drift.
Talk abaht bitch chewed dogs, yer gets ut frum Daisy an Heidi hops in fer her chop. But mate, ther Missus ses true Artists always have ter suffer fer their art so p'raps yer on yer way ter u great c'reer. how do yer get aht uv it anyway?
Ther Missus says yer Boss is sending sympathy in ther wrong direction. Ther cold were crook but ut's Heidi what's got ther infected neck, (geeze i'd die with me leg in ther air if ther Missus started wearin er collar).
Did ther boss read her bit on ther blog abaht bullets? She were a bit dark on him. Yer know what? She says she were hot under ther collar so p'raps she's gunna wear one one day! Blimey that'ud be one fer ther books would'n ut?
Clyde.
Comment by Chris Champion
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Yer missus appears to appreciate the artistic temperament. I'm planning my next piece, a sculpture to be erected in the middle of the living room carper, from old bones. I'm hoping the Big Boss will love it, and take pictures, and write a story, and give me extra dinner.
Talking about dinner, Big Boss did see the bullet comment, and said it gave him food for thought.
S
Comment by Anonymous
Dus yer get ter keep yer old bones? Ther missus throws all ours out. I reckons yer on a winner with yer sculpcher stuff, yer could do one by ther sea in Synny, ther Boss an Missus go ter see lots of ther things sometimes when they visits Bronwyn what loves Heidi mor'n me, an they say they're worth big biccies. Yer might get a biccie thut takes a week ter chew up ef yer dus one there!
Ther Missus says ter say thanks ter Big boss fer readin her stuff. She keeps tellin ther people what adopts our dopey foster dogs ter read yer stuff so she can't be too dark ut yer Boss.
We've bin wavin ther flag fer GAP ut er big do te'die an I'm pooped. Yer gets real tired showin everyone how much us Greyhounds like bein cuddled an rubbed.
We're off ter visit ther Boss up ther track termorra, send yer a line when we gets back.
Ooroo f'now,
Clyde.