Areas of uncertainty
November 28th 2010 06:57
Is that an edible camera?
The petrix.com Dog IQ Ranking List rates greyhounds at number 77.
Petrix.com, when it compiled this list, did not use Scratchy as its greyhound breed representative. If it had, the reputation of greyhounds in terms of natural intelligence would have suffered greatly in all areas except that of food foraging.
Which leads us to the subject of doors. This is the one area in which Scratchy is brighter than Daisy. Scratchy knows how to open a door which is ajar - with a prod of the nose from one side and, more impressively, a deft flick of the chin from the other side. He even knows how to test a closed door by leaning on it.
Daisy thinks doors are things humans go through for all sorts of reasons, and which are closed to prevent her from jumping on the bed. Scratchy thinks doors are a world of opportunity in that, being opaque, one can not be certain there isn't food on the other side until one checks.
Regularly.
If petrix.com had judged greyhound intelligence solely on Scratchy's door-opening capabilities, greyhounds would rank well ahead of border collies and just behind burglars.
Not that Scratchy cares. He's too busy leaving no door unopened in his search for food. He scoffs at the idea that windows have any meaningful relationship with opportunity. His world contains only doors of opportunity.
When it comes to acts of calculation, Scratchy knows to think not with his heart, but with his stomach.
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Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
No wonder Scratchy opens half-open doors. He thinks they're a jar. Boom boom.
Another enjoyable read, my friend.
Comment by Chris Champion
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Thank you kindly.
Comment by heidiclyde
Has it occurred to you that you could use your remarkable door opening capabilities to benefit Daisy? You open the door that stops her getting onto the bed, Daisy gets onto bed, Daisy's opinion of your brain power goes up a few notches. Everyone benefits you see.
As for these stupid hooman lists of intelligence, how dare they assume that rushing around trying to please their every little whim is the equivalent of intelligence?
Clyde and I go to Dog Club, we do things there with our hoomans that help them learn to understand our body language and how to communicate with us through their rudimentary body language. Some of the other dogs toil away doing everything they can to reward their hoomans every effort at communication. Clyde and I give the Missus rewards when she is being sensible but we refuse to do it if she's worked us too long or it's too hot or if she's shown us she's trying to make us do something we don't like.
Last time we played with the agility equipment. I like the sea-saw and the high up board walk, Clyde used to do them very carefully but the Missus didn't remind him to stop in the middle of the sea-saw this time, to let it change sides gradually, it went with a bump and he said that was the last time he'd do it. He stuck to his guns too, serves her right, she was the dope who forgot the rules not him.
I wonder what the hoomans would think if we did a list on how intelligent or not we think they are?
Sniffs,
Heidi.
Comment by Chris Champion
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Daisy's not allowed on the bed except when Little Boss is in it. If I open the door during the day so she can get on the bed, leaving a tell-tale dint in the covers for the Bosses to see plainly when they get home, there is less than perfect domestic harmony, a situation which has been known to dilute Big Boss's potential to daydream while serving dinner, and thus compromise the possibility of absentminded addition to the regulation portion.
And we don't want that, do we?
Wags,
Scratch
PS Writing blog post comments is way more fun since I started using the dictionary.
Comment by heidiclyde
Are you trying to do a one Greyhound job of raising the hoomans opinion of our intelligence? You do realise that poor Clyde hasn't got a clue what you are talking about when you use such advanced language, don't you?
I must admit that, having read your latest offering, I'm having to revise my opinion of your intelligence, but nothing anyone can do is going to teach Clyde to speak the King's English. Perhaps your acts of calculation are all based on your stomach but I suspect poor old Clyde wouldn't even know an act of calculation if it stared him in the face.
licks,
Heidi.
Comment by Chris Champion
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Anyway, haven't you got more important things to do? Look at the big hand - it's almost at the top. Must be time for dinner.
What? What do I care where the little hand is? Don't complimikate things.
Comment by heidiclyde
Hoomans! You can't trust them without a lead on them can you? Honestly the things they'll do to get a laugh. I mean, just look at the awful jokes at the start of these comments, the Missus was rolling around laughing at jokes at your expense Scratchy!
I apologise for assuming those were your words, I should have known better, they simply weren't in character were they?
Licks,
Heidi.
Comment by Chris Champion
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Should have been obvious it wasn't me. For a start, I can't type that quickly.
Sounds like your Missus should be called Missterious. Like all hoomans.
Wags,
Scratch
Comment by Seyal
Seyal's Slice of the Universe
Seyal's Adventures in Dog Training
I have a door opener myself. I had to teach my dog how to open a door, but now, he can open any door that's not locked/requires a knob.
He'll be determined enough to push even the patio door open if there's enough of a gap for a nose or a paw.
Even my folding door in my room is no match...from the inside. He knows to stand on his back paws and push it hard enough to make a crack for his nose - then it's push, and opened.
Once I taught him that - he ran with it. If he can push the door open, he will. He can close doors too - but he hasn't done that on his own...yet.