Dog definitions
May 24th 2009 06:15
Greyhound greeting protocol
My human's a nice enough fella but his language skills are a bit of a laugh. For one thing, he gets the meaning of things all muddled up. For example, you should see what he calls a run!
So, just to help out, and for the sake of a bit of efficient communication around here, I thought I'd make the following list of terms and phrases that the two-legged guy regularly gets wrong.
In each case, I've given the Man's definition, followed by the Greyhound's definition. Just to ensure you're following me, the definitions preceded by G are the correct ones.
M: Man, master of the universe
G: Man, provider of dinner
M: Greyhound, world's gentlest pet
G: Greyhound, master of the universe
M: Slow walk
G: I'm cold
M: Walk
G: Are we moving yet?
M: Power walk
G: Perceptible movement
M: Jog
G: This is almost worth getting off the sofa for
M: Run
G: Fun
M: Sprint
G: Fool! Let me off this damn lead and I'll show you what sprint means
M: Thinking pace — blog content idea generation
G: Thinking pace — how long until dinner?
M: Exercise regime
G: Born to run
M: New running shoes
D: New chew toy
M: Scenery
D: Sniffery
M: Other dogs — smile
D: Other dogs — Whine, yap, touch nose, sniff front, sniff rear, sniff under, wag
M: Other humans — smile
D: Other humans — Not there, you two-pawed oaf. Just behind the ears ... ahhh, that's it
image: www.dogguide.net
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